By this time, visions of sugar plums are no longer dancing in folks’ heads and once again people are engaged in “reality,” whatever that may be for each of us. I tend to equate the actual arrival of each new year with the emotional equivalent of a hangover. For those of you fortunate enough not to have had a hangover, allow me to describe the feeling. Typically, there is a headache, general malaise, and an aversion to bright light especially sunlight, all resulting from consuming too much holiday libation.

I don’t have those kinds of hangovers any more, so what is this emotional hangover that I experience? It too is an aversion to the light – the light of unconditional acceptance. After the hubbub of parties, gift exchanging, and sometimes frantic activities culminating in New Year’s Eve celebrations, the dawn of the first day of the year has a certain stark appearance snapping me back to the reality there is a life out there insisting on being led. It reminds me life is not about tinsel and preoccupation with material stuff. Life is what we came here to do in the first place.

To say that the December holidays, however they are celebrated, are mostly about cramming a lot of pseudo happiness into a couple of weeks before January 1st is a cliché. Just about every pundit worth his or her salt lambastes this season at one time or another, and it is tempting to do so once again. I choose not to. Instead I would like to focus on something that happened to me very early in this new year and led to the title of this proposal: How May I Support You?

First, some background is relevant. I “coach” a lot of people over the phone and through email, and occasionally in person. I learn a lot about what is happening in people’s lives, and if I can offer an ear or some knowledge relevant to the situation at hand, I offer it with the warning it might apply or not to that person. Like anything done frequently, the coaching I do gets to be routine. “Learn to love yourself, take two meditations and call me in the morning,” is a facetious example but not too far from what I often advise.

I got a call a few days ago from someone who after reading some of my articles/commentaries sought coaching. The person talked for a while in response to my typical question, “Tell me what’s going on with you.” Based on what the person was saying, I jumped to the conclusion that this was one of those calls dealing with the very mystical and woo-woo-woo. I don’t do mystical and woo-woo-woo (sometimes woo-woo is okay) because very frankly I don’t understand it. I simply do not relate to statements regarding the 17th ascension of the house of Miramar in a crab nebula in the outer region of some galaxy. I do not in any way discount anyone’s experience with such information. I just don’t get it, and if you do, I honor you, but please don’t expect me to relate to it in such a way that I can explain or interpret what is told to you or you experienced in those domains.

I am a spiritual fundamentalist; that is not to say a religious fundamentalist. Spiritual fundamentalism for me is simply viewing human beings as having the need to fully and unconditionally love and accept ourselves before we can make any real progress in evolving and walking our paths more directly. However that happens is great, and if channeling Ishmael from the galaxy of Fahtah is what moves you to go inside and heal your dark places, we all benefit from your doing so. I have my own process that I personally use, and when appropriate, teach others. Back to the mystical and woo-woo-woo call I got in early January…

After listening for a few minutes, I told the person that I did not think that I was someone who could provide coaching based on what I heard. I explained about being a spiritual fundamentalist and the limitations of how I work. I expected the person to say okay and end the call. The person did not and continued to describe the situation from a perspective I could not relate to, so I hung out in the conversation and gave up trying to understand what was being related. Then the strangest thing happened.

First, I was engulfed in a bath of energy and light snapping me out of my half-listening mode and energizing every cell in my body. No it was not the caffeine I sipped while listening. It was better than caffeine. I experienced this sensation before but never while coaching. Second, I started getting “messages” for the person on the telephone. So I interrupted the person, and said something like, “I am getting something that I you need to hear,” and repeated more or less what was told to me. The result was pretty amazing in the sense the person on the other end of the phone immediately related to what I passed on. That’s not all…

Third, as I described what I heard, I began to incorporate and interweave relevant practices and principles from my coaching “model.” The effect for the person was even more powerful and made the resulting meaning and consequences of the information exactly what was needed at that time. The person asked some questions, and I answered them using what was told to me by spirit blended with what I knew. It was a balance of specific relevant information for that person from Source interwoven with what I have learned over the years about healing and why we do what we do as humans. What occurred was an overlay of personal and specific information for the person onto my fundamental understandings formulated over the years. It was incredibly powerful for the person and for me as well.

For several hours following the conclusion of the call, I was in state of Grace. God touched my shoulder. The world seemed different, friendlier, brighter. I got that the question to ask someone is not, “Tell me what’s going on with you.” The question really is, “How may I support you?” I have my moments of intimacy with God, with Source, and up to this coaching call had separated those experiences from my direct contact with others except for generalizing and crafting what I learned into homogenized practices and principles I call “understandings.” This was different – a real-time blending of understandings with what is real and relevant at the time as communicated to me for the other person. (To read a description of this form of coaching please click: Multidimensional Spiritual Coaching.)

The point of this proposal is to ask the question of someone, “How may I support you?” Open yourself to whatever the person says and open yourself to Source to learn what the person needs that he or she cannot access for themselves. This is the great gift we have for others. Healers often say the hardest people for whom to facilitate healing are themselves. Sometime it seems that we can know what other people need to hear when they themselves cannot. I think I know why, but it is another exploration for another time.